It was such a delight seeing these photos from my brother earlier this week. Experiencing the day through his eyes and seeing things from a guest’s perspective was a treat. The wedding was a magical, dizzy blur, to be honest, and there were details in the photos he snapped that I missed entirely. I never even saw our custom cocktail napkins at the bar! My friend Herbie designed them, along with our Save the Dates, invitations, table numbers, place cards, and labels for the special cider one of Jamal’s groomsmen brewed for us –aptly named “Love at First Cider.” We have the best friends.
Another dear, dear friend of ours –a poet himself– read a Pablo Neruda poem during our ceremony, and if I had to pick a moment where I was closest to dissolving into tears, that would have been it. Amazingly, I held it together the whole day.
My twin nieces were darling little flower girls, a role they took very seriously, and with only minimal eye-rolling when I begged them to practice their petal-scattering technique over and over (and over). My 10 year old niece was a junior bridesmaid; in a twist of wonderful symmetry, I was a junior bridesmaid when I was 10 years old in my brother/her parents’ wedding, and here she was 17 years later as a junior bridesmaid for me. Jamal and I both wished we could have seen the girls walk in, instead of being at the back of the line, trying to catch a glimpse down the aisle.
Oh, speaking of: yes, we walked in together. In addition to not wearing white, not having a first dance or parent dances, and not cutting the cake, this was one more silly wedding tradition we decided to do away with. After my dad passed away, I had always sort of pictured my brother walking me down the aisle, but the screaming that suggestion produced from my mother is still making my ears ring. It wasn’t worth the fight, so Jamal and I found another solution, which guaranteed us a sweet, private moment together before marching out there, and allowed us to unintentionally ‘fight the patriarchy’ at the same time. Did you know that Swedish couples traditionally walk in together? Having done it now, I’d recommend it for every bride-to-be. Who better to cling to than your soon-to-be husband?