You Ruined It.

I found my dream room, you guys!

Check that beauty out. All white. Everywhere. Not a speck of color in sight. It’s perfect, it’s heavenly, it’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of. The room is a concept installation by Japanese artist Yayoi Kusama, photographed by Mark Sherwood and Ray Fulton, and on display at the Queensland Museum of Modern Art. It’s called “Obliteration Room.”

Check out that living room! I spy a bunch of IKEA products. And did you notice how everything is white? Because it is! It’s all white!

Aw, look, a woman and child, sitting on the white sofa in the white room, drinking out of white tea cups. Even the little girl has all white on. Oh, um, hey, little girl? You’ve got something on you there. It’s like a sticker. I think there’s one on the table, too. You should clean that up.

Hey, wait, what are you doing?? You’re getting those colored stickers everywhere! Didn’t your mother ever tell you not to put stickers on the walls?! This is getting out of hand. You should stop. It was good when it was white. Come on, let’s put the stickers down before–

Oh my god, oh my god. They’re everywhere. You guys…there are dots….EVERYWHERE. I’m having trouble breathing. I think my heart just deflated and fell out through my belly button. It can’t get any worse than this, can it? It’s can’t, there’s no way–

I’M DEAD. I died. My soul exploded at how sacrilegious this entire thing is.

The purpose of the art installation was for it to end up exactly as it did. Children were given stickers and encouraged to “decorate” (!@!&$(*SJHGFSJHDKAGGJ!#) the room, to live up to its name of “Obliteration Room.” You know why it’s actually called that? Because my soul was obliterated upon seeing it. I can’t believe people let their children do this! This is not art! This is destruction at its worst and a million, rainbow-colored reasons for birth control at its best. Obviously you cannot have children and an all-white home. GUESS WHICH ONE I CHOOSE.

(I’m posting this for therapeutic reasons, so that I may become more comfortable with it. It’s the same reason I watched “Little People, Big World”; to become desensitized to midgets, sorry, dwarves, sorry, Little People. It’s all about facing your fears. And apparently I fear nothing more than all-white rooms being RUINED by color. Except for spiders. And elevators.)

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January 5, 2012 / design / LEAVE A COMMENT / 12

12 comments

  • Ugh, I can actually feel your heart breaking into a million little pieces. Say, did you notice that it says “Joe Cool” on the wall in that last photo? Can you see it? You don’t realize it now, but you are already prepared for children because you have Fitz.

    • I can sort of make it out, but the L in “cool” looks like a capital “U” so I’m not sure about it, haha.
      If that’s true, what you say about Fitz preparing me for children, then Fitz is the best birth control in the world!

  • Oh. My. I think you and my dad might be the same person. Regarding the, um, Little People, that is. Only he won’t watch.

    • I sound like such a jerk for being uncomfortable with Little People, don’t I? Oh well, at least your dad and I are in the same boat!

  • is that child playing the piano???? And how come there are no stickers on him/her?

    • Unless he is a baby genius, I’m pretty sure they just posed the kid there (in a conveniently white t-shirt) for the shot. Personally, I’d cover the kid in stickers and then say “THERE! HOW DO YOU LIKE IT?” but that is why I don’t have children.

      • Or just give him a dose of chickenpox!

        • Hahahaha. I had the chickenpox when I was a kid and I’d never wish that on anyone! Even a little sticker-brat like that….

  • i hate to tell you, but i want some stickers. in fact i’d like to go back to the fourth picture down and have some fun with patterns and, well, stickers! maybe it’s because i’m a teacher, but it looks really fun. of course in the white room, i can picture grape juice, red wine, and other normal-world colors making that white look much worse than it looks with stickers! i have kids, can you tell? wonderful blog! glad i found it by way of theresa. happy saturday!

    • Ha! You are most definitely a teacher and a parent! I try not to picture red wine stains or anything worse, because I don’t think I could cope!
      Happy weekend, Noreen! Very happy you found me, too.

  • Oooh, doesn’t it make your brain itch?!

    I have a daughter but, thankfully, she’s shaping up to be neat enough to live in an all-white home. :)

    • It does! It makes my brain itch. What a great way to put it!

      If I ever have children the one requirement I have aside from them being happy and healthy is the ability to live in an all-white home! You’re very lucky!